My honey's birthday is coming, this is his first birthday that I accompany with him, he feel so happy.
I had prepareed his birthday presents scretly, and expected it could give him a surprise. I bought a wallet that the brand he like most as his birthday present, and reserved a special birthday cake then put it at the restaurant we planned to go. Every thing goes right and perfactly.
As my expectation, he felt touched and happy, and we had a good day. He said that it is the first time that someone prepare an wonderful birthday for him. It would become the most special day in his mind.
I had prepareed his birthday presents scretly, and expected it could give him a surprise. I bought a wallet that the brand he like most as his birthday present, and reserved a special birthday cake then put it at the restaurant we planned to go. Every thing goes right and perfactly.
As my expectation, he felt touched and happy, and we had a good day. He said that it is the first time that someone prepare an wonderful birthday for him. It would become the most special day in his mind.
1 則留言:
Hi. The first paragraph has a run-on sentence (only one!) with two comma splices. Watch your spelling on "prepared" and "secretly." Also see "he like" and "we planned to go to" ("to" was missing) and the tense in "everything went perfectly well. As I had expected, ..." Also, "an wonderful" (!!). . .
Can you see the many careless places I am talking about? Just slow down and spell/grammar check sometimes! Take more care and you will be OK.
Chris O'Brien
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